Loving the iPhone...adoption a complete fantasy

I am home sick from work today so might as well do a little update. I got my iPhone this weekend and love it!! It cost more than I anticipated because my current contract still had a year left but being a loyal customer they cut me a few deals to make it bearable. We'll see if they live by their word on the next bill lol. I love the phone though! Would recommend it for sure Francesca. This is how I keep my mind off of the bigger issues in life...a little bit of toy therapy :)

As far as the adoption goes...it doesn't really. It is a complete fantasy right now and I can't even picture it happening anymore. I have begun to make plans for events and gatherings without even thinking about the adoption as it is that far beyond my realm of comprehension right now. A friend is having a housewarming May 1st and both Pat and I accepted invitations on Facebook without hesitation...without even thinking about where we'll be or if we'll be parents by that time. We just assumed we will be still here in Ottawa and still childless. I'm not even willing the phone to ring or obsessively checking my email anymore. It's weird. I guess for me I just reached a point of utter despair then popped out the other side somewhat indifferent to the whole thing. It appears to be the only way for me to handle what is happening. I guess I'm tired of being mad, sad, frustrated and helpless. I've decided to live my life and if it happens wonderful and if it doesn't...well...I just won't think about that right now. What else can one do after being through 2 failed referrals and now waiting for 8 months since the 3rd referral with the last bit of news being "there are complications"? Might as well not think about it anymore and just try to enjoy life.

Now, back to my iPhone...it is so much fun!